x. Past and Present }

[mismatch]

My pads hit off the ground as I trotted forward, excited. I didn't know why I was so happy, maybe it was happy to be alive in such a wonderful world where I was almost flawless, where I was so close to perfect it was almost hilarious. After all, who wouldn't be insanely happy about such a blessing? Not anyone sane...How could you hate such a wonderful gift? Not only that, but I had such a great personality. I was kind, loving, caring, loyal, I could hunt. I was needed no help from my owner now. I was free. I needed no help to keep going. Of course, still, I enjoyed Sadie's company. He may be quite upset at me right now though. Not really sure why though...I only got us lost and stuck us in the middle of no where. I only gave us freedom. I gave us the ability to live carefree. Our hunts would be planned around our schedule. Our lives would go according to our own will, not bent to that of a humans. After all, those creatures were so pathetic, so horrible. Yes, I loved them, don't get me wrong. They're providers of company, certain kinds of knowledge, food, shelter, and water, but they're stupid if anything. They had no set speech, only random incomprehensible blurbs of noises that only at certain times had any sense. They merely poorly copied canine language and adapted it as their own. Stole our complex and beautiful language and made their own failing and flaw-filled language. Though still, once again why wouldn't you want to copy off of our superiority? I rarely don't know. Canines are only the supreme race after all. They completely towered over felines, sheep, humans, rodents, and of course deer.

“Hey, Sadie, isn't this awesome? We're finally free! No one's controlling us anymore!” An almost sickly sweet smile was upon my maw as I spoke. Almost anyone with a mental capacity more complex then that of a chipmunk could tell I was so happy, joyful. The fence was gone. I had passed all believable boundaries and I kept going. I was still going. I was pulling myself farther and farther away from the barn without a problem. I was invincible. I was free. I didn't know how to break it to myself to make myself stop pulling that up, stop realizing that. I kept coming to mind, I couldn't stop it. I was too joyful, to out there. My tail was whipping back and forth, back and forth, back and forth at full throttle as I made my way forward. The sound of bird echoed in my ears as I went on only hoping Crusader, or as I like to call my brother, Sadie, would follow. My paws seemed to sink slightly into the dirt, the soft dirt. There were no cities here, there were no in danger. My tongue lolled out of my mouth, and out of boredom I sped ahead. I wanted to feel the make-shift wind in my fur, I wanted to roll around in a puddle somewhere, or do something interesting. I want to find that deer I was chasing, kill a small animal, something. I really didn't know why I had a sudden burst of energy to tell the truth, but I did, and I wanted to use it.

“Sadie?” I asked, almost confused as I slowed my gait to a trot, then a walk, and then I stood stalk still waiting for a kind of reply, any kind of reply. In a way, it had felt as though I had gotten so far ahead, but had Crusade been following at all, or had I lost him as well? Had I lost the one canine I cared about, my twin. The tip of my tail wagged slightly, confused, scared. My head was turned toward some bushes I had just ran through and I waited for Sadie to hopefully come through. I wouldn't go back for him, wouldn't turn around and try to follow him somewhere else. I was leader...I wasn't giving up that spot, but if he chose to leave I'd be lonely. Still, I wasn't that mentally weak. And even so, I wouldn't force him to listen to me. I wouldn't drag him my way. In some odd twisted manner, it seemed not as though we merely walked the same way, had the same destination, as though we didn't really follow each other...We were just kind of...There.

I whined slightly, but I just stood there, still, waiting, hoping. It was quite an odd thing. I had been in my brother's presence for so long, without him, the world seemed dark and lonely. My brother had always been there, had always been following me. Without him, the world just looked different. He had always been there. Never once had he not been around. He made everything seem...Less lonely. When you had been around someone your entire life, to run ahead and then look back to make sure he or she followed make everything seem darker, even scary. It makes you ask yourself, “Why did I do that?” or “Where is he?” or even “What's missing?”. At first it can be hard to place your finger on, to tell why you feel so cold, so scared, why the world seems so...Lacking of something, and then you realize how lonely you really are...How dependent on the other you rarely are. I shook my head, If he isn't coming, he isn't coming. I tried to tell myself, but I couldn't. My mind wouldn't accept that he may not come back. Another whine was released from my maw as I waited for some kind of sound, some kind of reply from my twin. It was a hard thing to let something go, and no matter how famous this quote is, it deserves to be repeated: You never realize how much you really love or need someone or something until it's gone. Such a hard lesson to learn unless you actually feel it. Such an odd lesson. Why couldn't creatures just accept they love or need someone to survive? I really couldn't tell. I didn't know. I wish I did though, I wish I could just understand this one thing.

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Word Count – 1101 Words
Muse - Exploding
Marionette - Jshaylar
This post is for Embers with Crusade

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[` EMBERS]

I don't want what you want,
I don't feel what you feel
See, I'm stuck in a city,
But I belong in a field

<sub>&&. A slight tremor shook my chest as I stumbled forward awkwardly, paws tangling together. Heaving in exhaustion, my heavy frame staggered a few more paces, pads scrabbling against damp soil as I slid rapidly down a steep knoll. A deep sigh emitted from my throat as I finally let my body fall slightly to the right against the dull trunk of a maple tree. It’s crusty bark, caking and teeming with fungi, fell to pieces at my feet as my form dislodged it, silencing their desperate attempt to cling onto the maple with whatever life they still possessed. Struggling to steady myself, and using the tree as my support, I managed to draw myself up into my usual stocky posture, heart still beating more quickly than usual. Nosing forward through the low growing green leaves of the maple tree, and cracking wick green branches as I pushed forward, I found my claws snagging against the thin roots at the end of the tree, sticky with moist soil. A few leaves brushes against the top of my cranium as my ears flicked momentarily before I drew them back against my neck in an almost feline-like manner. I was alone.

&&. A hugely vast lake basked in the expanse to my right, quivering water lapping lightly a distance away. Murky green surface bore no reflection of the swampy trees looming over it, nor the high snow-capped mountain range that lined the far side of it a good number of miles away. Algae mingled in with the cattail and reeds like brothers in the shade of the forest canopy, while the pebble-strewn shore laid ridden with human garbage, and waste. In all of my experience with the forested region of the world, these flecked amber eyes had never reflected such a vision of a place such as this. The gentle pawing of curiosity at mind’s door intrigued me deeply, while my paws shook off the weak grip of the thread-like roots and proceeded forward inquisitively. Though I was purposely keeping myself ignorant of the grave situation I was landed in, I chose to ignore it. I did not frequently cast off the presence of the reality of situations, but labeled this new experience as an exception to my usual habits, as nothing quite like this had happened to me before; this was a time of observation, and the retention of information.

&&. The cloudy heavens gave way to a dreary gray sky above my head, and long-tailed wisps of fog drifted seemingly lower and lower to the ground until almost seemingly drifting into the vast body of the lake. As my breathing had slowly ceased its rapid beat and returned to its usual steady pulse, I trotted forward more briskly along the lake’s shore. At this hour in the evening, the dew laden grass that sprouted up in shoots haphazardly amongst the rocks revealed that a light rain might have blanketed the area less than an hour ago, while the lack of puddles farther up the bank explained that the lake’s depth was as deep as it had ever been. If I and Jshaylar decided to camp here for the night, as it was inevitable we must, we must keep note not to draw any closer to the lake when the excess rain water evaporated for fear that any new rain would simply wash us out. My maw opened as if to speak, but only let out a slight grunt. Jshaylar.

&&. My friend, brother, and identical twin was nowhere to be seen, leaving my surroundings ostensibly empty without his wolfish figure prancing about foolishly a few paces ahead. I shook my head subtly, realizing I had no seen a thing of him except his hindquarters in well over a few hours. It was his foolish actions that had delivered my own self out into this unknown wilderness, of course. With my own sense of logic, I would have never strayed more than thirty feet away from the master. Jshaylar must have had quite a different view on our situation than I. It was most likely his belief that he had delivered us from imprisonment, a standpoint I could easily counter with the fact it was a “prison” in which we were fed, cared for, and, possibly, loved by the masters, an obvious number of facts that concluded our home could not possibly be described as a jail.

&&. The heavy scent of buck still lingered in my nose, a constant reminder of the devil that tore my brother and I away from our home. No longer could I remember the sweet scent of hay in the barn, nor the stale, dusty scent of the tiny food pellets laid out to us each day. Perhaps I had not taken enough time to engrave those simple, everyday scents and sounds into my mind in the way I should have. Their sudden absence of presence beat rapidly above my head, each crack in the dirt, and imprint of my passing only left me with a vague feeling of unhappiness for what was now lost. My brother had led us to the point of no return, the state of mind in which we had to accept that we could not turn back to what lay in the past of our lives, but weave them into a new future, a new direction unknown to us; the life of a stray, was our new destiny to create.

&&. However, the out of place feeling reeked in my nostrils. Never had I imagined myself becoming what I was now said to become. Neither had I planned to be stranded alone with only my brother to depend on; my self-centered, reckless, twin. No matter the strength of love that kept us bonded together, my presence in his felt as if I were a deadweight, something weighing him down from what he wanted. No doubt, that was true. If I were not his anchor, his life would be in pieces, his carcass rotting at the bottom of some forsaken cliff his careless behavior led him over. Yes…it was too obvious that he believed I was stealing from him opportunities he considered valuable. He could not live a day without me.

&&. Tearing my eyes off of the lake where they had resided restlessly as my mind whirred, I veered sharply away, shredding the delicate pattern of a spider’s web woven in between the branches of two saplings, and hastily stalked deeper into the wood. Jshaylar’s scent was strong, and his muttering pattering loudly against the drums of my ears. The fool was probably standing nearby, babbling aimlessly to himself concerning my absence. Reckless, and dependant, he was. So seemingly like a God, yet so false, so very false. A second wolf-like shadow then fell upon my own as my pupils jumped at the sight of a second Wolfdog. Of course, my musings had been correct, as his head swiveled around continuously, seeking out my figure. Narrowing my gaze, I padded forward.

&&. Coming sharply around his left, I paused as I came up beside him, one paw still dangling, unmoving in the air, and eyes filled with reproach at the abhorrence of the situation. A low grunt was all I needed to retrieve his attention from his flustered state. Perfect, Lars. You’ve done it again…bravo. Thank you, for another spectacular mishap.</sub>

I'm sorry you were thinking
I would steal your fire.
The heart beats in its cage
Yes, the heart beats in its cage

Total Word-Count;; 1,231
Puppet;; Crusade
Creativity Level 1 - 10;; Nine
Lyrical Muse;; Heart in a Cage – The Strokes
Intended For;; x.Mis.Matchx with Jshaylar
Notepad;; Aw, playing these two is going to be awesome!