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Post by ` EMBERS on Jun 16, 2009 16:32:16 GMT -5
Mama, we're all full of lies.
Mama, we're meant for the flies.
And right now they're building a coffin your size,
Mama, we're all full of lies.
Her simple touch still made me swallow hard. Soft breath near my collar bone, steady and calm, sounded quietly, timing with the beat of her heart, and though she couldn't hear it, it felt as though it was purposefully resounding like a metronome in my ears. The femme had once again attempted to comfort me as I grew distressed and cross at our failed attempts at communications. As I had little experience to begin with, this failure's impact planted a hopeless feeling deep in my gut, one that had rooted there like a weed that failed to be pulled out by the gardener.
I had not the need to tell her how awkward the entire situation was for me. My face could plainly state my predicament, as well as bewilderment for her ability to keep me from releasing the explosive emotions in my chest. Though she did not lean on me this time, she stood at an agonizingly close distance, simply staring at me as if she expected me to say something to her. I kept my eyes directed elsewhere, as the only time I locked eyes with another was usually when they were just waiting to lie dead at my paws. For once, I could do without killing my new companion. If she continued to keep my anger and emotions neutral, I would have no need to vent them by my usual means of murder.
Not wanting to inch away from her in a rude manner, I decided to make another attempt to talk with her. It was inevitable that she had taken a liking to my presence, and I too realized that if I was on the path of becoming just like any other dog, I would have to keep her around to seal shut my emotions. To do this, I would have to invite her to come along with me on my travels. Staying the the same location had always irked me, mainly for the fear of recognition of killing another. In truth, I loved the sensation of killing, the blood and such, but that's obvious. The pathetic part is that I always feel awfully terrible about the ordeal once it's finished, and I'd go creep away in a guilt hole until I flared up again.
Stepping away from the closeness of the femme, I started walking in a small circle--rather than a straight line, as I didn't want her to think I was leaving--and looked about me, as if I was a traveler. I hoped my sudden try at communicating had not been too abrupt, as I had given her no signal of what I was going to do prior to my actions. After circling her a few times, I stopped and motioned toward her, tossing my head back as if to say, Care to come along? For a moment I stood still, admiring my actions. This had probably been my best shot at getting my point across. With a smile, I realized that this was the first time I had ever felt true pride. Though I tried to convince myself that I was proud when I stood over the body of a foe, it wasn't true; I could never be proud of homicide.
Hesitantly, I returned to her side, not nearly as close as she had placed herself, but a good foot and a half away. If she would travel with me, I knew I would have to learn to be near another without developing a stone in my throat. Giving her an odd half-smile, I sat patiently at her side.
Mama, we all go to hell.
Mama, we all go to hell.
It's really quite pleasant
Except for the smell,
Mama, we all go to hell. Total Word-Count;; 608
Puppet;; Rivalry
Creativity Level 1 - 10;; Seven
Lyrical Muse;; Mama - My Chemical Romance
Intended For;; Mental with Flicker
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Post by MENTAL on Jun 19, 2009 17:51:06 GMT -5
 Someday, baby
You and I are gonna be the ones
Good lucks gonna shine
I kept my light colored eyes focused completely on him, my attention not drifting off of him for anything at the moment. I am just waiting patiently, just letting him take his time to communicate with me because I have faith in him and believe that he will try it again. Even if it was just because he wants to get rid of me in some way or form. I don't care what makes him say something so long as he does. I don't want him to just give up because it isn't as easy as just talking to a dog normally.
We all have our days where nothing goes as planned. I know that my days never go the way I think they might. It is just a fact of life, and one that we all have to get used to some time. Its inevitable that no one should understand either. There's no one in the world that can read our minds, sometimes not even the one who's mind it is can read it well enough to fully understand. Sometimes it could be discouraging and downright depressing but you just had to accept it and move on. You couldn't just give up every time something didn't go your way.
Every demon and every ghost of your past comes out when you just give up and give yourself up to depression. As soon as you lose the will to try and make things work then you let all those bad things come and take over your life. I have seen it happen many times. Something that had just made me even more determined to never let it happen to myself or anyone unless there is absolutely nothing that I can help with to prevent it from happening. It is always a sad thing to witness.
That's why I didn't want him to give up. I want him to keep trying until he does it so that he can see that things do work out if you just stay determined. I can already see that there are things that haunt him though what those things are I don't know. I don't want him to just give up completely. I want him to find his freedom. So that he can just be happy for the rest of his life. I'm not sure how it has been for him so far but I'm sure it could be better. There's always some way that someone's life can be better. I already consider him my friend and I know that he'll get it right eventually. He can make his life better, he just needs to realize that for himself.
When he starts to walk around me in small circles my expression turns curious as I let my eyes follow him attentively. Not wanting to miss anything in case it made me misunderstand what he is trying to say. I know that he is telling me something. And I can tell that he is actually trying this time, which just makes me pay even more attention to even the smallest movement that he makes. I take in the way that he is moving his head as if looking around and I cock my head to the side thoughtfully. If he keeps walking in circles he's going to make me dizzy though.
I guess that he wants to go somewhere, maybe to look at something or not. Either is possible. He could just be trying to tell me he wants to go somewhere new where there's new things to see.. There's a lot of different things it could be but most of it tells me that he wants to go somewhere else. But does he mean to go with me or without me? I watch him stop walking in circles and motion towards me. My ears had gone back a bit as I stood thinking but they came forward instantly as I was brought into what he was saying and I watched him jerk his head backwards.
Did he want me to come with him? My head is still cocked to the side and I just pause for a second while I think about it some more. Then I motion to myself questioningly and then to him before motioning just in another general direction, my expression questioning. I just want to make sure that he means that he wants me to come along. Instead of just assuming that it is what he means when it might not be. If that happens then I'll definitely feel very ashamed. Since I'm supposed to be good at this whole communicating without words thing.
I had caught the smile on his face as he stood still, and I knew that he was feeling proud of himself. He had done good. A smile makes its way onto my face as well as I just keep watching him with a happy expression. Watching him come closer again and sit close to me before giving me a half smile I just kept smiling, sure now that he didn't want me to leave. I would definitely go with him, there was no reason why I shouldn't want to. It would be a lot nicer to have someone to travel with instead of getting lost on my own because I don't know the places that I end up in or how I get there sometimes.
But if he wants to go somewhere then why is he sitting down? I move closer to him, my expression turning playful as I lift my front paws off the earth to push them against his warm body lightly, just wanting to make him get up again. I make sure to move away quickly just in case he reacts badly. I don't know him that well yet after all so he can react in an unexpected way. My tail was wagging and I was eager to get going, not wanting to stay in this place either. My head was cocked to the side with a questioning look, asking him what he was waiting for though whether he would catch this somewhat subtle question I wasn't sure. I couldn't really make my communications extravagantly obvious and exaggerated every time. That would be too tiring for both my mind and body. I just kept watching him while I waited for him to start moving so that I can go with him, wherever he decides he wants to go.
I am already infatuated with him, it is just a part of my personality and I knew that this would happen as soon as I saw him. I don't really know whether I need him but I do know that I want him around me. Maybe he needs me and neither one of us knows that. Maybe I can help him achieve something he can't otherwise achieve. And maybe he can help me to reach some potential that I have that I don't even know about. But there's no way of knowing unless we just stick together. I want to find out, its just one of those mysteries that you have to solve or it will just keep bothering you that you don't know the answer.
I'm still watching him and waiting for him to move, being distracted enough by my own thoughts for there to be a possibility that I had missed it if he had already moved. I don't like it when that happens, because I can't hear things it just offers others too much of an opportunity to harm me in some way. I usually choose to look on the good side of things and just assume that they won't though. Because I believe in karma, so if I hadn't done anything to them then why should they want to harm me in any way. It wouldn't be fair. And if they did then something bad would happen to them as well. And I choose to believe that everyone has at least some good in their hearts and souls. No one can be all bad.
Maybe that's why I can see through the faults of those who I meet and just see their good sides whether they or anyone else can see it too or not. Some dogs just don't know how to bring out that good in themselves and they just need a nudge in the right direction. Maybe that's what has happened with him, he's gone off on the wrong track. That could explain why he keeps seeming so uncomfortable with me around him. Unless I am actually doing something to make him uncomfortable without noticing. But I'm sure he would've let me known by now if it was me doing something and not just things in his mind.
Someday, baby
You and I are gonna be the ones
So hold on, we're headed for a better life
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Words;; 1505
Muse;; bout a seven
Tagged;; Ems with Rivalry
Notes;; I think I rambled a lot in this post. But I'm not sure. lol. I don't like it much though.
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Post by ` EMBERS on Jun 20, 2009 11:11:13 GMT -5
All of my life I've been waiting for someone like you
To fill the void inside of me
Even if there's ten thousand miles between us
You'll always be the one closest to my heart
Her motions blurred as they passed my flickering optics, intently studying the rise and fall of her broad chest as her body led a parade of motions for the mere purpose of my observation and understanding. The way her facial features shaped, widening eyes, the upturn of her nose, or the quiver of her lips seemed to give emotion a different meaning from the perspective of the onlooker. A questioning glance between us felt stronger than even my own emotions stretched, even in the most out of hand situations that I have experienced throughout my time with my own unpredictable actions.
As I had completed my own round of our charade, I was focusing intently on her, her comprehension of the actions my only current concern. To my delight, she at first seemed in disbelief, perhaps astonishment, at my offer, but seemed to understand the suggestion I had put forth to combine our travels. And yet, she still seemed inquisitive about something...I looked to my paws, bony and pock-marked with scratches. The earth beneath me was hard and cracked, a desolate grey color that bled the gnarled roots of a nearby willow tree. For the first time I noticed how quiet it had grown, and wondered if this was perhaps how my companion lived daily, without a single sound to console herself. Suddenly it seemed as if my blinking made a sound.
Ponder, I might, but my train of thought vanished as I spotted her pointing to herself with an expression on her face that said, You want me to come with you? I looked at her with a still blank expression on my face and nodded. Yes. My maw parted slightly, saying the words only with the tip of my tongue. And though she would never understand it, and I would never be able to help her do so I added, You can seal away my emotions. I can be normal around you...
As the words escaped my lips, I could feel her paws against my shoulder, in somewhat of a playful manner, I assumed. It caught me off guard, to be honest. As the only pup in my litter, I recalled no time when I had played or done anything of the sort, really. Growing up, I could recall various times when other pups around my age, also separated from their parents, would attempt to tussle or push me around good-heartedly like my companion did. But as a child, without any such understanding of my emotions whatsoever, I only became angry at my misunderstanding of their--unbeknownst to me--playful actions. But I found my only reaction to the femme's touch was to stumble clumsily to the side.
Straightening myself up, I looked into her eyes and realized that she must be wondering why we weren't moving out now. Right now? I asked, more so directed to myself rather than her. I turned my head over my shoulder and noted the pathways that lead from the clearing we had stood in for almost an hour now. The wind had thankfully died down into a quieting breeze as my head swiveled around on a craned neck, noting the exits we could take out of the wood. I was just dying to go somewhere big, somewhere where I would blend with the crowd; a city, perhaps. It was too risky out in the rural areas, where not so many dwelt. There, I risked publicizing my emotions to a single dog that came across my path, who ought to notice and remember my face in the future. No...it had to be somewhere where I would be just like any other dog.
I walked a little way aways from the female and tilted my head. Do you want to start walking now? My question echoed. Today, I noted thoughtfully. Is the beginning of a new journey for me...
I managed to bolster the defense of my heart
A bit too dense, a bit too strong for my own good
But you saw the small glitch in the solid ice wall
And somehow you scaled it up and made your way in
Total Word-Count;; 664
Puppet;; Rivalry
Creativity Level 1 - 10;; Seven
Lyrical Muse;; Encaged - Sonic Syndicate
Intended For;; Mental with Flicker
Notepad;;
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Post by MENTAL on Jun 21, 2009 6:34:03 GMT -5
Someday, baby
You and I are gonna be the ones
Good lucks gonna shine
I watched him fall clumsily to the side after my paws collided lightly with his shoulder. It did not really seem to me to be anything strange though. It was the way I would have assumed any dog would react to my playful movements, though I am still careful of every single one of them. Just in case my assumptions are wrong. I don't want to get hurt just because I made the silly mistake of trusting a dog too quickly when they should not really be trusted at all. He seems to have been surprised by my actions, why that is I'm not too sure. And I can't really ask him either, because it is a question that is just too hard to ask with motions and actions alone. Words are needed or he will just misunderstand me again.
As he straightens himself up I can see that he is thinking and I can see him utter words that I cannot hear him speak. Instead I have to rely on reading his expression which seems questioning to me. Had his words been a question? Probably. But I do hope that he hadn't meant the question for me to answer because then he would just have to live with the disappointment of getting no answer because there is no way that I can answer the question when I don't know what it is.
He was looking over his shoulder at something and I wondered whether he had heard something or whether he was just looking at something. I turned my gaze in the direction that he was looking to try and see if I could see anything there or not. A little bit of a confused expression appears slowly on my features as I can't figure out what he is looking at and I turn my gaze onto him again, letting my facial features turn questioning while I just watched him and waited for an explanation if he was going to give me one.
I let my eyes follow his movements as he stood and walked away from me a little, a smile coming to my lips as he tilted his head in a questioning manner. There was just no way I was going to let him leave me behind. I went after him at a sort of jog until I was at his side. I stepped towards him as I moved to let my side bump against his warm side in a playful way before I quickened my pace again to go ahead of him.
My feelings for him were growing inside of me, expanding slowly so that eventually it would fill my entire being. I can feel its progress. I already have wishes for him running through my mind every time my eyes move onto him. Even if it is just for a brief moment or two. I want him to get everything out of his life that he can, so that he can dream as big as he wants. And I don't want him to worry at all because worries can weigh down those dreams and make them impossible. He just needs to take a deep breath and go for it. I hope that he will eventually realize that I feel this way about him. There's no way for me to just tell him clearly what I think and feel, its too difficult for me to express in movements. Even subtle ones.
Being given the opportunity to even travel with him was filling me with excitement. Though that was partly because it meant that I wouldn't have to be alone anymore. I don't like being on my own because it makes me feel too vulnerable. It was turning my mood more playful though. I found it funny that we had gone from complete misunderstanding to being traveling companions. A strange companionship maybe but a good one none the less. If it became more than that in the future I would definitely not complain. Because love is something that I want. Especially from him. But I know that the chance is small and unlikely, so I won't get my hopes up too high.
Life is supposed to be an adventure. So I don't really care what happens at all. I'm just in it for the thrill, following the road that led somewhere mysterious. Wherever it wanted to lead me I would go. No matter how many curves or bumps there were. It was just all part of the ride. I am willing to take any chances I need to take so that I can live my life fully. There's no use avoiding these sorts of things. Just like there's no point in avoiding my feelings. I want to stand there and just let him know what I am feeling, even though it is probably too early still. I want to climb to a mountaintop and scream it so the world can know. I want to leave no doubt in his mind. That's part of the way my heart works. But there's no way for me to do that. Maybe later I will be able to figure out a way. For now I just need to be contempt with being with him in companionship.
I had slowed my walking again to match his pace so that I could walk next to him calmly, a small and happy smile on my face. Sometimes I find it almost amazing how I can be so optimistic when there are things that haunt me as well. I see so many dogs who can't even be happy when they have had a good life with nothing sad about it at all. But it has helped me to deal with things, I'm not afraid of facing my past or what happened. I have accepted it completely and sometimes I even feel like I owe my happiness to it. Had it not been for what had happened I would still be living with humans on that testing station. And then there would have been no way for me to meet any of the dogs I have met, and nor would I have been able to fall in love with them either. Rivalry included.
Someday, baby
You and I are gonna be the ones
So hold on, we're headed for a better life
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Words;; 1056
Muse;; bout a seven
Tagged;; Ems with Rivalry
Notes;; Poor little naive puppy.. lol.. If only she knew what he's eventually going to end up doing. I keep feeling like just having her start talking, as if she could actually hear all along because I think that would get an interesting reaction.
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Post by ` EMBERS on Jun 22, 2009 18:47:26 GMT -5
I feel it everyday it's all the same
It brings me down but I'm the one to blame
I've tried everything to get away
So here I go again
This morning, I woke up sore, and angry. Angry at myself. Angry at my life. Angry about the unfortunate happenings I've survived through. I was always angry, always frustrated at myself for being so imperfect. I want to be perfect. Flawless. Amazing. Pristine. An idol to everyone. I want to be noticed. For good things. Not for being the murderer that I am. You only gain enemies if you're a murderer. Not if you're a saint. If you're a saint, all you get is the good stuff. The happiness. But I'm not a saint. Why would God give that job to a dog? A messed up dog. A dog named Rivalry. No. God wanted me to be a murderer. That's why I was born. That's why I want to die.
But I don't want to die now. And I'm not angry, either. Maybe the reason why my emotions are so hard to control is because I'm making it that way. Maybe if I accepted myself, I'd be able to be some kind of saint. I could change my name, call myself something pretty. Well, not exactly pretty, but...something not so...evil. Rivalry. It was fitting, though. That's what I am, that's what I create. Whenever I'm around you, whenever I'm around anyone, there's a taut twine string of rivalry that's tied between us. Because I can't accept you. Because I can't accept anyone. Everyone else is normal, and I can't be. I envy them all. I want to be like them. They make me angry. That's when I lose it. But my companion doesn't make me angry. I think she makes me happy. Though I'm not exactly sure, I believe that's what you'd call it.
Over and over, the same thing. The anger build-up, the sense of erupting...then I'd look over and see the dog at my side...this small new friend that I'd made without even speaking...and I'd feel better. The more I thought about the situation, I became frustrated, puzzled, but I managed to slip in and out of that state by focusing on her presence. It was a different kind of feeling, one I'd never really experienced before. I had never bonded with anyone before, not even the close brother, or sister relationship most had. My parents weren't exactly present to provide company, nor did I ever start out my life with humans. It'd always been me. Just me. No one else dared enter the sphere I'd formed around myself. But now I had her, and we could both help each other with our company.
The plush evergreen needles bent underfoot, seemingly soundless, yet loud to my sensitive ears. A gray sky peered over the sharply pointed tops of the pines, taking cover as I passed beneath a canopy of leaves, and bursting out as I emerged from the coating of green. Myself and the female, whose name still remained a mystery to me, had proceeded to walk at a leisurely pace. At least, I was padding at a reasonable walk, while she bursted ahead with a surge of energy, a sort of eagerness that had yet to experience. However, she had managed another playful gesture, a bump, per-say, leaving me still and startled for a moment, but not quite unable to keep myself from moving forward.
I watched her weaving in and out of the trees, her body the needle that wove a tapestry out of her gentle fragrance. Observing her was like sitting amongst the people of a foreign country, those who acted so much differently than you were accustomed to. I was surprised to find that she eventually slowed her pace to match my own, and as she did, I suddenly felt quite slow next to this figure of bubbling energy. Quickening my pace slightly, I stole glances at her frequently, hoping to drown out the voices inside my head that repeatedly reminded me of my weaknesses, of what I could've been. Oh, and I also talked to myself frequently, just for the sake of speaking, to keep myself from thinking to hard. I hoped she wouldn't find that too strange.
Why, isn't it lovely out? I mused quietly, imagining the conversation she and I could have had had she not been deaf. Oh, yes, I enjoy early summer. Wonderful time of year. What was it you said your name was? I looked over her hurriedly, scanning her bodice as I had done so many times before in my time with her. What did she look like? Sally? Much too simple of a name. Clarice? No, it did not suit her. I suddenly was craving the knowledge of her title, yet had no idea of how to ask her for it, nor how she would answer. Ah, how troublesome a deaf companion could be. But she was all I could ask for, really.
Sighing, I looked toward her again. Are we going anywhere particular? I asked, gesturing around in attempt to show her I wanted to know where she intended to head. I continued to walk upon the trodden leaves, avoiding the slick mud that lined the path's sides. This new emotion...this joy of being around this canine...puzzled me in a way I had never experienced. It was intriguing how certain events shaped your life in ways you barely knew.
Over and over, over and over
I fall for you
Over and over, over and over
I try not to Total Word-Count;; 934
Puppet;; Rivalry
Creativity Level 1 - 10;; Eight
Lyrical Muse;; Over and Over - Three Days Grace
Intended For;; Mental with Flicker
Notepad;; Your huge posts are making me feel like a terrible roleplayer. D:
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Post by MENTAL on Jun 24, 2009 6:17:18 GMT -5
Someday, baby
You and I are gonna be the ones
Good lucks gonna shine
Imperfection is what makes everyone special, it is what makes each of us our own individual being. I love the imperfections about those dogs that I meet, those little things that make them different from anyone and everyone else. I once met a dog with eyes the color of the leaves on a tree starting to bloom when the season changes to spring. He could only see the outlines of things, shapes and shadows made up the picture in front of him. I’m glad that when I met him I had still been able to hear and talk because I’m not sure that we would have been able to communicate otherwise. He was my first love. I always fall for the imperfections of a dog and not really the actual dog, maybe that’s just one of my flaws. But I can’t be perfect either.
This dog who was now my companion, I could tell that he had several imperfections but I can’t really tell what they are yet. He thinks that he is dangerous and that I should be afraid of him. But why? Maybe he has done something in his past that makes him think that he is dangerous to others. Whether he is or not I don’t care, it just makes him all the more interesting to me. And the challenge and adventure of finding out everything I possibly can about what has made him into what he is and what still makes him be the way that he is. Only when I know everything about him can I know whether he is perfectly imperfect. But I bet that he is, something just tells me that he is.
Maybe he wants to be perfect. But doesn’t everyone? I know that I don’t so it can’t be true that everyone does. I would find it too boring to be absolutely perfect, it would mean that there is nothing exciting about me that’ll even make another dog interested in talking to me or even paying attention to me. If everyone was perfect then would there really be a ‘perfect’ way to be? Or maybe we’re already all perfect and we just don’t realize that because we’re too busy worrying about the things that we think are wrong with us when really they’re the things that make us perfect. Perfection is a very complicated but extraordinarily fascinating thing to me. There’s always more to learn and think about on that topic.
I will be the one to show him that he is perfect, at least in my eyes, as perfect as he will ever be. I can show him many things if he lets me, maybe I can even show him how to truly accept himself and be happy. Like I am. Maybe I will even be able to show him how to love. He doesn’t really seem like he is used to be around others much. Maybe something bad happened in his past to separate him from his family, which could be why he was on his own. There was something about him that seemed lonely though. Or maybe I’m just thinking that because of his lack of social behavior. He didn’t really join in my fame or encourage it when I bumped his side with mine. Though he did accept it without acting defensively, which was good. Because at least that meant that he wasn’t completely hostile.
The scent of the pine needles was strong in my nose. I could see them clearly and feel them underneath my paws but the scent of them came to me the strongest, the sweet smell of damp earth accompanying it. Forest.. Every smell in this place screamed forest. Everything about it was pleasant to my senses. I lowered my nose to the earth to breathe in the earthy smells while I kept my pace equal with his. I had noticed him quicken his pace a little after I had slowed mine to match his. I kept my nose close to the earth while I stayed next to him, enjoying my heightened sense of smell. I could scent any and every animal that had passed here before us and several different scents came to me all at once in an almost overwhelming fragrance of life and activity. All of this brought a happy smile to my face. I truly do enjoy life and everything that it holds.
I could see the way he kept glancing at me but I refrained from looking at him, just letting him keep himself aware of my presence while I seemingly paid no attention to him. But I could multi-task. I could fill my nose with the scents of the forest and still pay attention to every little movement that he made. It was easy enough even without being able to hear anything. I could see him speaking, sure that he was speaking to himself because he wouldn’t be naïve enough to think that I had possibly just suddenly regained hearing and could respond to what he said. He could talk to himself if he wanted, it was his choice and I wouldn’t think any less of him because of it. It was just another interesting thing to add to my little list of facts that I was finding out about him just by observing. It was so much more fun when you couldn’t just ask questions to get answer.
I saw him look at me again, a little differently this time. It made me a little self-conscious and I wondered why he was looking at me so much. I had nothing to hide so I don’t know why I should feel that way under his troubled gaze. But I was suddenly aware of myself to the extent of feeling the muscles move underneath my short coat as I moved. Lean and fit, somewhat skinny too. I suddenly wondered what it was that he thought about me and I lifted my head to look at him, a questioning look jumping into my eyes before dying away like the flames of a fire being smoldered. I didn’t really care that much what he thought, he was entitled to his own opinions though I would still love to know what they were.
I was about to put my nose to the earth again when he made a motion that caught my attention, knowing straight away that he was trying to ask me something or tell me something. I watched his actions closely and then shook my head with a playful expression. Part of the fun was not knowing where you were going and just being surprised when you got there. I didn’t know whether he would agree with that and there was no way I could tell him that either. There was a lot of things that I wanted to tell him but couldn’t, a lot of questions I would’ve loved asking him as well. But I will gradually learn what the best way to communicate with him is.
Having given him the answer to the question he asked, a question which I had hopefully understood right, I put my nose back to the ground and my movements stopped instantly, my nose quivering slightly as I double checked my findings. Yes.. I had smelt right the first time, a rabbit had passed this exact spot just a few seconds ago, not even minutes, mere seconds separated the notoriously hopping creature from us. It was tempting.. oh, no I shouldn’t.. What the hell, might as well. I let my nose lead me along the path that it had taken, through the mud that lined the path that we were on, staining my white paws the color of the earth. It was only moments before my movements had brought me close enough to scare the creature out of its hiding place, I had almost stood on the poor thing before it jumped out.
I think if I had been able to hear I would’ve known it was there before I got as close to it as I had. When it jumped away from me I stood, shocked, for a moment before setting off after it. My movements fast and precise as I went after it, fast enough to catch up and keep up but not nearly fast enough to catch it. I didn’t want to catch it, I had no use for a freshly killed rabbit. Even though the thought of it possibly being food made my empty stomach rumble. But I don’t care, I don’t want to eat it. I just want to have some fun and chase it. My ears are perked forward, an excited and amused look on my face as I keep chasing after it until it disappears into a whole in the earth, one where I cannot possible follow. The chase had been silent, no barking or any sort of sound had come from me.
Not being able to follow it any further I turn and make my way quickly back to my companion, my friend. My tail wagged happily and my tongue hanging out of my mouth as I panted, trying to catch my breath again. It was only a few moments before I pulled it back into my mouth, having caught my breath successfully. It hadn’t been that much of an exertion. Just a small run. I look over at him with a calm and happy expression, just wondering what he would do. I move close enough to him as I fall into step next to him so that my wagging tail would hit him, just to see what he would do. My expression is playful again, my eyes flickering with teasing mischief as I glanced at him curiously. Being with another dog made me happy, and being happy made me playful so I couldn’t really help my actions.
Someday, baby
You and I are gonna be the ones
So hold on, we're headed for a better life
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Words;; 1644
Muse;; eight
Tagged;; Ems with Rivalry
Notes;; I love these two.. =]
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Post by ` EMBERS on Jun 25, 2009 12:01:13 GMT -5
It seems like every day’s the same
And I’m left to discover on my own
It seems like everything is gray
And there’s no color to behold
They say it’s over and I’m fine again, yeah
Try to stay sober, feels like I’m dying here
Scientists say the brain controls the body. The brain is the centerpiece, the one thing that makes you do what you do, act the way you act, think the way you think. They say it controls the body, that it's the engine in a locomotive, the battery inside a flashlight. Perhaps that's also true of the heart, as well. The heart keeps you alive, breathing. And without your brain pulsing inside your scalp, or your heart throbbing inside your chest, the scientists say. But that isn't true, is it? How can they sit there and talk about the brain and heart making you a living breathing creature, without mentioning the soul? That's what makes you the you that you know yourself to be, that's what shapes the personality, the individual uniqueness, your strengths...and your weaknesses.
I've never seen a soul, not with my eyes, and I probably never will. But I don't imagine it like the brain or the heart. No. The brain is pink, it's the size of two of your paws. Your heart is red, and it looks...like a fairly bizarre shape. The point is, that everyone's heart looks the same, everyone's brain, even though it may hold different memories, different lives, they all look the same. The brain is only a container, a storage unit in which to place the things you've lived through. But the soul...the soul is different. In everyone. I see the souls in different colors, different shapes, different sizes, and each of those souls are filled with the differences, the traits that belong to us all in such different ways: curiosity, contempt, wistfulness, the ability to dream big, swirling around in a torrent of colors inside of all those diverse souls.
To my side, my companion trod happily, her own soul bubbling from somewhere deep inside her bodice. And every time I glanced her way, I couldn't help but struggle to pick apart her soul, the inner workings, the cogs that made it tick. Who was she really? What did she stand for? All questions that I could never ask, but only answer from observation. From the looks of it, she appeared to believe that she had deciphered a good amount of my soul's secrets. If only I could simply tell her...It was rather irksome that she could not read my lips, for our communication could be much clearer if she were capable of such an ability.
I was rather dissapointed in the answer my companion gave me when her motions inferred that she merely intended to walk without any true idea of where her destination would be. Perhaps if I was an adventurer like herself I would jump at the chance to embrace the unexpectedness of this, almost, game. But seeing as I did not want to end up somewhere where I would stand out to individuals, I knew I would have to somewhat influence our direction to avert our destination to more of a cityscape.
With a turn to the female, my mouth opened to speak the words I would soon imitate with motion, but found that she had, to my surprise, dashed off. A confused expression spread across my face until the scent of prey swirled into my nostrils. Of course. I was so busy picking apart the situation to notice the scent. Taking this to my advantage, I moved to the far right of the wide path on which we traveled, fully aware that whenever the road forked, we should take the right path to lead us to the city. How did I know? It was the same path I had traveled on to get me here in the first place. For the first time, I wondered why I should have traveled this way in the first place. Perhaps I had thought that it would be impossible to run into anyone in such a vast forest. I was beginning to notice how frequently I was wrong.
Upon my companions return, empty mouthed, I looked her over with a confused expression. I still did not understand her, her sudden bursts of energy, the happiness I could not banish with my forewarnings of danger she put herself in as she traveled with me. I nodded to her slowly before proceeding to walk forward. Do you like the city? I asked aloud, more of a mumble to myself, for I had no idea how to ask her the question through motion. Hoping she did, I found my mind hobbling down poorly paved asphalt alleyways, pads pressing down on the cracked pavement, claws clicking. How long did it take for me to get here? I thought back to my travel into the forest, trying to piece together how long our travels would be before we came across a city. With a shrug, I decided that I would need to change my attitude to be more like my companion's. Who cares? We'll get there eventually.
And I am aware now of how
Everything’s gonna be fine one day
Too late, I’m in hell, I am prepared now,
Seems everyone’s gonna be fine
One day too late, just as well Total Word-Count;; 846
Puppet;; Rivalry
Creativity Level 1 - 10;; Eight
Lyrical Muse;; Fine Again - Seether
Intended For;; Mental with Flicker
Notepad;; Oh my God, I just realized how nicely this song fits Rivalry. xD And yeah, they'll make a cute couple, seeing if Flicker will forgive him after he half rips her face off. O:
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Post by MENTAL on Jul 3, 2009 16:00:53 GMT -5
Someday, baby
You and I are gonna be the ones
Good lucks gonna shine
I could see his motion towards me and then int he direction that we were going, sure that it wasn't just him looking at me then forward. His lips were moving as well and his expression seemed questioning. But I wasn't sure what he wanted to know. Did he know where we were going? Maybe he wanted to know whether I did. That had to be it. I shook my head lightly, hopeful that that was the question. I would hate for there to be too many more misunderstandings between the two of us, there had been enough already.
I keep my head turned towards him as I walk, giving him a chance to respond to my answer if he wanted. Then I picked up a little faster pace, running a little ahead before I let my nose drop to the earth again. There was too many smells at the moment and I didn't really feel like paying that much attention to them so I lifted my head again, just looking in the direction we were going as I stopped and waited for him to catch up to me again before I would keep walking with him.
I was starting to be curious about where we were going, wanting to get there so I could see where 'there' was. It was fun not knowing but knowing was sometimes even better. I kepy my attention on him again, so that I wouldn't miss anything that he might do to try and communicate. I let myself walk closer to him, so that our sides would almost touch. I was hoping that he wouldn't move away but if he did then I would jst let him. There was a feeling of safety in being with another dog, no matter how much he would want to warn me of him being the danger.
Someday, baby
You and I are gonna be the ones
So hold on, we're headed for a better life
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Words;; 235
Muse;; 2
Tagged;; Ems with Rivalry
Notes;; Next post will be longer, its just because I had to wait so long before posting.
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Post by ` EMBERS on Jul 4, 2009 12:27:20 GMT -5
It seems like every day’s the same
And I’m left to discover on my own
It seems like everything is gray
And there’s no color to behold
They say it’s over and I’m fine again, yeah
Try to stay sober, feels like I’m dying here
Pine trees, dipped in gray shadows, built a fort of always green needles lacing our pathway. They seemed to grow denser, as if knit together as we trod down the nature littered trail, kicking aside brittle pine cones, the children of evergreens, and brusquely avoiding the sharp little pebbles that scattered the area. The sound of rushing water reverberated around the dense forest, carrying the swift scent of the river with it. A sudden longing for sunlight drew my eyes upward into the canopy of clouds and tree branches basking in the late, starless night. Not even a shining moon lingered to soothe the eyes seeking light.
My companion's inability to speak had begun to haunt me in a rather eerie fashion, and I found myself mumbling frequently to avoid the silence that greeted my ears. The faint paw steps left my my companion, and my own careful pads that only rustled the settled dust were my iron bells, our soft breaths a racing locomotive. Damn noises. My meaningless curses chased away the sounds that filled the quiet. For once I'd kill to be deaf. I knew that last statement was a lie, though: I'd never want to be deaf, forced to ignore nature's din; the patter of rain, the howl of the wind. For the first time, pity welled within me for the inconvenience deafness provided for the female by my side.
Ceasing to murmur inaudibly, I picked up a low pitched hum, keeping my lips closed tightly as to keep my newfound friend from picking up my discomfort. However, I was not sure whether it was the silence, or the noise the penetrated the silence that disturbed me, for both were nerve-racking in my opinion. Silence has a certain feeling to it that portrays non-existence, and irrelevance to the world, both words that I tend to avoid usage of. But the gentle hums and whirs that had such a volume in my ears had almost a scent of loneliness and insignificance as well. If only I could simply talk to my companion, filling my ears with words I could make sense of, and vanquish the ever-growing noises of the rural area.
The side upon which my companion trod had grown increasingly warmer in the past moments, and my pupils diverted their gaze to my right, upon finding the female padding awkwardly close. Her content expression explained to me her ease at being so near to another, while my own feelings for her actions differed greatly. Umm... My mouth parted to, perhaps, object to her movement until recalling the fact that she would be unable to understand my question. Instead I gave her a sheepish, uncomfortable glance before sidestepping a couple of paces and continuing to pad on at a slightly faster rate.
A curiosity seemed to leak out of the Fae, and I was beginning to sense an eagerness as to our destination. I realized it would soon be time to influence the course upon spotted the forked road I had traveled upon earlier, one path leaning to my left, and the other to my right. Previous experience told me that the right path would lead us to my desired place of arrival: the city. The left hand path, however, had a mystery location lying at it's end, a new region I had yet to explore. Stealing a glance at the femme, chocolate irises forced themselves to focus on the forked dirt pathway ahead. Right path, right path... My lips barely quivered as I spoke the words. Right path is to the city... Please choose the right path. Implored my mind as it kneeled before the femme.
And I am aware now of how
Everything’s gonna be fine one day
Too late, I’m in hell, I am prepared now,
Seems everyone’s gonna be fine
One day too late, just as well Total Word-Count;; 626
Puppet;; Rivalry
Creativity Level 1 - 10;; Seven
Lyrical Muse;; Fine Again - Seether
Intended For;; Mental with Flicker
Notepad;; When are we going to close up this thread, and where are we taking it after?
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Post by MENTAL on Jul 6, 2009 8:09:38 GMT -5
Someday, baby
You and I are gonna be the ones
Good lucks gonna shine
I could sense his discomfort at me being so close and I let him sidestep without making his discomfort worse by going closer again. I went faster as well though, going ahead of him because I just couldn't stay at the same pace the whole time. It just bored me. Occasionally I got bored very quickly, because I cannot listen to any sounds like others can, all I have is the things that I can see and smell and feel. You never really realize how significant sound can be until all you can hear is the sound of silence. Yes, silence does have a sound, a sound that you cannot truly appreciate until it is the only thing you hear. It's an empty sound though, different from normal silences that you get when you can still hear, deafness is different from that, very different. Surprisingly different in fact.
There was a fork ahead of me and I stopped as I stood in the middle of the path considering the two options and trying to decide which one I wanted to take. I didn't know where either of the two led and even if I had known I would probably have forgotten by now anyway. It didn't make much of a difference to me which way we went so I turned my head to look at my companion for an answer to an unspoken question of which way. It seemed that I didn't need to ask that question however, several subtle things about his movement and general body language was telling me to go right. Sometimes I have no idea how I tell these things but it comes naturally to me.
I turn towards the left just to tease him a bit, going along the path a little before I stop and turn my head to look at him, cocking my head to the side with an inquisitive expression as I wag my tail playfully so that it might show him I'm only playing. I just wanted to see his reaction. I turn around and go to the right fork though, going slower so that he can catch up with me again. I like having him next to me, even if he doesn't want to be too close to me. I can deal with that. As long as he's there. It'll be hard for me to go back to being on my own again now, I like having another dog with me too much to want to let it go too fast.
I don't know where this path leads or why my companion seems to want to go this way but I guess I'll find out soon enough if we just keep going. I'm not even going to try and ask him though, because that'll just make him unhappy and frustrated because it'll bring on a whole new misunderstanding I bet. Something that neither him or me want to deal with I'm guessing. I know that I don't want to, it seems a waste of time to stop our short travel just to work ourselves up over a simple question of why. That's the trouble with me, nothing can be simple, it always has to be unnecessarily and annoyingly difficult. I can't even ask for a dog's name. I've never tried though. I might have to try it with him later and see if I can do it. Maybe he'll understand if I think of a good enough way to ask him. It would be nice to know his name. Not that I would be able to call him by his name or anything like that. But I do miss knowing others' names and telling them my name because a name always means so much. It used to tell me everything I needed to know about that creature.
I turn my head to look at my companion as I keep moving forward towards our mysterious destination, only mysterious to me though because I'm sure of the fact that he knows where we're going. My gaze is curious because I'm finding myself wondering about him once again. All I had to go by to judge him was the way he looked and his body language. Which really did give me some mixed messages, mostly because of what I saw him to be and what he tried to tell me he was. I think he might just be deluded or something like that though. The poor thing. I guess I'll figure it out eventually though, there has to be something that'll tell me more about him. I don't think I need to know more, I know enough about him already to be content in his company. And that's good enough for me. At the present time at least.
Someday, baby
You and I are gonna be the ones
So hold on, we're headed for a better life
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Words;; 823
Muse;; 6
Tagged;; Ems with Rivalry
Notes;; that was a pretty fast post. =]
It shouldn't take them too long to get to the city should it? I'm just thinking that it would be easier if you post in the city first, because then I'll be able to incorporate where he is and what he's doing in my post. She'll be trying to stick to him as if she's there to replace one of his body parts or something. hehe.
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Post by ` EMBERS on Jul 11, 2009 16:53:22 GMT -5
It seems like every day’s the same
And I’m left to discover on my own
It seems like everything is gray
And there’s no color to behold
They say it’s over and I’m fine again, yeah
Try to stay sober, feels like I’m dying here
Black ice. The kind you get in the dead of winter. Slick, deadly, but almost invisible at first glance, you don’t expect it when you’re walking down the road in noisy snow boots, trying to avoid the sidewalk covered in a half a foot of snow. Maybe the salt truck just came by, and the asphalt on the street looks so nice, and clear, that you can’t imagine a better place to walk on such a bitter day. But then that black snow boot unexpectedly wanders over a patch of black ice and begins sliding forward so rapidly you’ve barely had the time to realize what’s going on. But even in the midst of your confusion, you can hear your stomach lurching forward, and your eyes opening twice as wide as they should be as you take in a gulp of breath, trying to jerk back your leg from the dusky surface. Perhaps you won’t steady yourself in time and will find yourself sprawled on the cold pavement, or perhaps you’ll have pulled back in time to regain your footing and will go on walking down the road.
Cracked black pads fell hard against the dusty road, my pupils moved back and forth as if following a pendulum swinging between the right and left hand paths before me. A sort of buzzing sound replaced the ringing of noises inside my cropped black ears as my companions pawsteps led her in the direction of the left-handed pathway. Her shadow ran beside her eagerly, bouncing as she begin trotting a few paces down the little road, leaving me astonished and unsteadied. Like stepping on ice, her actions left my stomach churning, and my eyes widen as if at gunpoint. If we took the left-handed path, as I’d been thinking about since we had first begun to walk, we would have a greater chance of running into an individual, one that we might be forced to interact with. This would act in a cause and effect manner than could possibly sprig my emotions, my damned emotions unfathomable in the eyes of my companion. The right path’s city would keep us inconspicuous amongst the crowd.
Reaching out to her figure urgently to ask her to consider the alternative route, I found myself drawing back as her figure made a sharp turn to move onto the right handed path. Of course… My dulled mind and rusty cogged brain whirred to like. She’s deaf. She ought to have picked up the ability to read body language by now. Inwardly stealing the feeling of dunces, I muttered a curse. She probably knew which path I wanted to take ages ago. Swerving my torso over to the right, I walked wordlessly forward, staring awestruck at the femme. The canine really wasn’t afraid of me, like I told her she should be. Did she even wonder what I meant? Did she imagine my with blood dripping from my teeth, and canine guts scattered at my paws?
Careful eyes, bordered by dark brown irises caught her glances as she threw them over her shoulder every so often. I padded a foot or two behind her, as if concerned she would suddenly turn around and waltz back in the direction of the rural bound pathway. Thank you, for that little heart-stopper, I muttered in not quite an irritable tone, but in a blank, dulled sort of voice. I couldn’t stay irritated, for my sensitive hearing had already picked up the hushed noises of a city in the night, filling up the noiseless silence. It was a satisfactory feeling, for I had been missing the urban cities since I stepped foot into the wood. Since I never really had a home, I guess the metropolis was as close as I was getting.
Breathing in, I tried to catch a breath of car gas, or the sight of headlights in the city I knew was only a little over half a mile ahead of us, but my damp black nose was met with only the simple scent of trees and grasses. I wondered if perhaps becoming deaf had enhanced my companion’s other senses, and she was already aware of the world that loomed ahead of us. Smiling without moving my lips, I could almost feel the heavy weights of night lifting as we drew nearer to the streetlamps and constantly lit neon signs in the windows of stores.
Perfect.
And I am aware now of how
Everything’s gonna be fine one day
Too late, I’m in hell, I am prepared now,
Seems everyone’s gonna be fine
One day too late, just as well Total Word-Count;; 736
Puppet;; Rivalry
Creativity Level 1 - 10;; Seven Point Five
Lyrical Muse;; Fine Again - Seether
Intended For;; Mental with Flicker
Notepad;; Okay. Maybe your next post should be the last? And then I’ll do like you said in our PM and make a starter post in a city board.
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Post by MENTAL on Jul 12, 2009 6:09:22 GMT -5
Someday, baby
You and I are gonna be the ones
Good lucks gonna shine
I could tell when he realized that I'd known which path he'd wanted to take all along. I was finding some things about him very amusing and it was starting to be fun to just play with his mind because it was almost too easy for me to do so. But I would try to resist doing it too much, I didn't want to put him off traveling with me. That wouldn't be a good ting because then I'd have to look for a new companion, which could take a very long time. I didn't want to go through being alone again. Not unless I absolutely had to.
Even though I couldn't hear the words that I could see him utter I knew that he wasn't exactly happy about my little trick. He didn't seem to find it as funny as I did. I slowed to a stop and waited for him to catch up before giving him an apologetic look. But I got distracted by faint scents that were unfamiliar to me. It made me perk my ears up as if to attempt to hear any sounds but nothing came to them. I cocked my head to the side too as I attempted to make out what the scents were supposed to be. I had stopped walking. But I couldn't figure it out, I'd never smelt anything quite the same.
I didn't know whether it was unpleasant either, something about it did seem vaguely similar to something familiar but not close enough for me to easily make it out. It was still a fair distance away so maybe if we went closer then I'd be able to find out what it was. I started walking again, slower this time. I wasn't sure whether I wanted to go to the place where the unfamiliar smells were coming from. Something about them seemed to be almost a warning, telling me that it was a bad idea. It didn't fit in with everything about the country. I didn't want to leave the country, I'd never left the country since having to run away to save myself from getting 'humanely euthanised'. I'm pretty sure there's nothing humane about killing a perfectly healthy dog just because she can't hear and her owner can't take care of her anymore.
My steps were hesitant, almost cautious as I continued forward, glancing at my companion every few moments as if to try and get reassurance from him that this really was the right path to follow and that our destination wasn't a place where I definitely didn't want to be. I know that my expression is one of curiosity but slight fear as well. Fear of the unknown that awaited us eagerly, wanting to accept us into its polluted arms. Pollution.. That's what I could smell. The uncleanliness of air that wasn't present in the country. I wasn't sure I liked where we were going at the moment.
Someday, baby
You and I are gonna be the ones
So hold on, we're headed for a better life
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Words;; 519
Muse;; 5
Tagged;; Ems with Rivalry
Notes;; last post! =]
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